Life by Zach: Defining things

So it’s been about three weeks of dating Beth – I can’t say that they have been very eventful though. We don't really do anything of substance. Our dates consist mainly of sorority parties, drinking games and listening to Beth and her girlfriends go on and on about who is dating who. So this weekend I decided that I’m going to plan a date for us that would be a little different, so that I could really figure out if I should continue this or not (even though I think I already know the answer to that one).

The date I planned for us was an outdoor one, because I love being active and I thought it would be a great way to bond over something other than shots of tequila, which I was getting very tired of. I decided we would go on a hike and then have a picnic. I know it seems kind of cheesy for a guy to incorporate a picnic into a date, but it’s the kind of thing Aleah and I would have done and absolutely loved. So I told Beth I would be picking her up on Saturday morning and to wear comfortable shoes.

When I got to Beth’s apartment, she bounced down the stairs in a dress and flip flops. Oh boy.

“Uhm, you may want to throw on some sneakers..” I suggested

“Why babe? You said comfy shoes. These are toats the best!”

“We’re gonna do some walking.”

“Ooh like at the outdoor mall?!” she squealed.

I was starting to think that my idea of surprising her with a hike would be a surprise all right, but not the kind I imagined.

“Well…not really. We’re going on a hike.” I said.

Silence. I could practically see the wheels turning in her head.

“Babe. I can wear my new Lulu Lemon yoga pants and pink Reeboks! Yay!”

Ok, I guess she found a silver lining. As I waited to her to change into whatever this lemon thing was she mentioned, I found myself wondering just what I was doing with her. I know, she’s no Aleah, that’s very obvious. And I also knew, even though I had a hard time admitting it to myself, that I allowed myself to get roped into this whole thing with Beth on an impulse because I was thrown by that picture I saw of Aleah at Elena’s wedding. So I guess in my mind I am hoping that eventually she will turn into the girl I want her to be. I know it sounds crazy; I know I shouldn’t be with someone I wish were totally different. But who knows, maybe she will love this hike and we can find some common ground.

We drove to the campsite and got all the gear out of the car. I had everything packed into a big backpack so that Beth would not have to carry a heavy bag; I didn’t want to overwhelm her too much. I handed her a water bottle as she glanced towards the trail with suspicion.

“Uhm, do you think there are bears?” She asked.

“Don’t worry, we’re going to be fine.” I reassured her.

The first twenty minutes or so, everything seemed to go well. The weather was perfect, and the trail was beautiful. I’d come hiking here many times before, so I knew exactly where to go. Beth was walking along next to me, humming to herself and seeming to enjoy being outdoors with me.

“Maybe we CAN do this,” I thought.

As we continued to walk, we came to one of the smaller crossings that had a small river running through it. I have crossed it many times, its not very deep or intense so I figured we would be ok. I did notice that today it seemed to be flowing with a bit more strength, but I thought nothing of it.

“Are we turning around?” Beth asked

“No, we’re going to cross it and then set up our picnic about another 30 minutes north of here.”

“Oh. Uhm babe? I’m going to get wet though."

“It’s going to be ok." I reassured her. "Its warm out today and we’ll dry up in no time.”

“Ugh. Ok. Just stay close in case I slip ok?”

“Of course!”

We moved ahead, but on either the first or second step I took, my foot started to slip off one of the nearly submerged rocks. I assessed the situation before me and realized I had a choice of either stepping directly into a foot and a half of deep water or just leaping to the next rock and hoping for the best. I chose to leap. I made the jump and landed on that rock, excited that I made it! However, I also quickly realized that my momentum was not going to allow me to stop jumping once I started, so I just leapt again, and again, and again. Within 2 seconds flat, I landed on the other side of the river, upright and completely dry! I was stoked!!

I turn around to see Beth just staring at me, mouth wide open.

“Uh oh.” I thought. “Ok I have to encourage her.”

“You can do it Beth, just jump onto the rocks like I did!”

“NO!” she yelled.

“Come on, I know you can!”

I was sure she would turn around, but surprisingly enough, she took the first jump and made it. She looked at me triumphantly and then tried the second jump. And this is where it all went wrong. In a matter of seconds Beth slipped off the second rock and landed on her butt with a big thump. I started to laugh because in all honesty it was funny, but then immediately jumped into the water to help her up.

“Are you ok?”

“I’m soaked!!” she yelled.

“I’m so sorry Beth, let’s get you across and keep moving so you dry off.”

I helped Beth across the water, but from that moment on, she lost any enthusiasm she had. The rest of the hike was spent complaining about how cold she was (it was about 90 degrees outside), how dumb hiking is, and “who even does this for a date?”

After what seemed like an eternity we finally got to the spot where I wanted us to stop for lunch. I unpacked the picnic while Beth watched in silence. I had decided to go all out with this picnic and packed us an assortment of goodies. I put together steak and blue cheese quesadillas, small chicken salad sandwiches, and hummus and pita chips. I also brought strawberries and raspberries that I put on small skewers so that we could eat them easily. Lastly, I brought along two mason jars of sangria that I had packed on ice for us to drink.

“Wow. This is nice.” Beth said.

Finally! No complaints. We started to eat, and for a few minutes things seemed to be normal again.

“Babe, I’ve been thinking.” She started.

This can’t be good.

“About what?” I asked wearily.

“About Facebook.”

“What about it?” I asked.

“Well, when are we going to be in a Facebook relationship?”

Oh man. Now I realize Facebook is a big deal to some people, but it never has been to me. I just never saw the point of announcing things to the world like what you had for dinner, or what things you think about every second of the day. I used Facebook primarily to keep in touch with people from home or to find about some of my school events, but otherwise I really just didn’t care.

“I just feel like you don’t care about me at all, babe. Randy Williams and Lacey Rogers got into a Facebook relationship like a week after they started dating.”

“Uhm, ok. How is that a gauge for a successful relationship?” I asked.

“Ugh, you’re such an ass.” She yelled.

I don’t know. Am I being an ass? Are my reservations much deeper than just not really caring about Facebook? Maybe deep down inside I know Aleah will see that and I don’t really want her to. But I also know that it’s not fair to Beth because my heart isn’t in this 100%. This argument seemed so trivial.

“There’s something else you should know babe.” Beth stated smugly.

Uh oh. My stomach sank. This can’t be good.